The Umbilical Brothers (KiDSHoW!)

KiDSHoW!

An interview with The Umbilical Brothers

It’s been some years since last we heard from Australia’s favourite physical theatre fruitcakes, but Shane Dundas and David Collins are back on Aussie stages with a brand new show that’s distinctly kid-unfriendly. When I catch up with The Umbilical Brothers, they’re just stepping off from a photo shoot where Collins is convinced the photographer is more exhausted than they are.

“Either he was really high or the camera was really heavy, I dunno,” he quips. “Or just flicking the button with his finger was really taking it out of him.”

It must have come as a surprise to two performers who are very used to bouncing around at breakneck speeds.

“I seriously get no exercise outside of performing because that gives me more than enough exercise, right?” says Dundas. “I’ve gotta balance it up.”

“And we really should learn to stretch before a show or do some vocal warm-ups,” Collins continues. “We don’t do any of that. Almost 25 years in and we’ve never stretched before a show.”

“I think if we started stretching at this point, it could seriously injure us,” Dundas says.

Fresh from an extensive stretch of overseas touring, the boys have a wealth of experience with which to craft their new show. It’s news to us, as the performance history on their website hasn’t been updated since The Portal Of Uncertainty opened in 2010.

“We’ve been to Holland, and that’s where the Portal of Uncertainty tends to open,” explains Dundas.

“We spent three weeks in Amsterdam one Thursday night,” says Collins. “And that’s what happened, so we haven’t really updated. It’s either that or we’re just fucking lazy and haven’t gone back to our website since 2010. You can make up your own mind.”

In fact, they’ve been anything but lazy, having now travelled to 37 countries across the globe, including the Baltics and Lithuania. “We’ve never been to Lithuania before and we did two nights of 900 people,” says Collins, boyishly excited. “And that was a hundred people standing in each show.”

Dundas is quick to add, “And there are only 800 people living in Lithuania – ”

Collins laughs, “Yeah, where the fuck did the other ones come from?! They’re already fans because they’ve seen three minutes of us on YouTube, and now they get to see an hour and a half of us doing christy-wisty weird stuff that has a through-line and a story, and it’s kinda like their brains exploded.”

The Umbilical Brothers’ new work, KiDSHoW!, stemmed from ideas conjured up by the gruesome twosome as they worked on their television program The Upside Down Show, aimed at – in Dundas’ words – “five-year-olds and stoners”.

“Your comic brain is always thinking about what the evil version of that could be,” he explains.

Collins clarifies, “What is the wrong thing that could happen in this oh-so-right situation?”

And there are many, many wrong things at their disposal. I’m treated to an audience with Timmy, a young boy the Brothers have ostensibly kidnapped for the show; the voice of a certain very famous mouse who cops at least one blow to the face during our chat; and a recreation of the moment when the boys accidentally decapitated Kermit the Frog in front of his own operators.

“All the characters we do, the fluffier they are, the harder they fall,” says Collins, and the two spontaneously develop a show concept on the spot in which they’re put on trial by their imaginary characters.

“Well, what’s the jury consist of?” asks Collins. “If they’re imaginary characters, we’re fucked!”

The Brothers are convinced that KiDSHoW! may be the perfect show for a BRAG audience.

“It gets a bit sick,” says Dundas, allowing Collins to elaborate.

“We massacre the Brady Bunch, for fuck’s sake,” he says. “One by one. It’s still as shocking as anything you’ve ever seen.”

Even though you can’t physically see them onstage?

“That’s right,” says Dundas. “We’re completely staying away from any sense of responsibility on that.”

The Umbilical Brothers' KiDSHoW! (Not Suitable For Children) runs Friday June 19 – Sunday June 27 at Roslyn Packer Theatre (formerly Sydney Theatre).

Post originally printed in The Brag, available at http://thebrag.com/arts/umbilical-brothers